you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
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