We got so high we made milksteak
I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
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