i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
Randomize