Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
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