People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
