return my video game
Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
Randomize
