I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
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