i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
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