I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
My ex's psycho new girlfriend found my vibrator I forgot at his place. Apparently she didn't find it as funny as I did. 😂
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Randomize
