Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
Randomize
