i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
Do you recall asking me to zip line through your wedding dressed as a bleeding angel?
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