Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
Randomize
