I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
Randomize