we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
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