WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
What??! Dude I'm not having you barging in at like 2 am smelling of cigarettes and disappointment to sleep on my couch and then have an awkward morning with my wife while I'm at work.
Touché sir
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
