Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
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