So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
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