the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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