new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
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