There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
When did angry sex become our thing?
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
Randomize
