Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
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