Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
Randomize
