Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
Randomize
