I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
Green mimosas i think yes
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
It's okay, I found my phone in the toaster oven. Logical explanation: 5 martinis
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
Randomize
