plz talk dirty to me
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
This is my life. Enjoy the view
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
Randomize
