put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
At the funeral we'll say nice things, like "She was delightfully extreme, psychotically wonderful, and could probably drink all you fuckers under the table."
That's literally the perfect eulogy
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize
