on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
Randomize
