Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
Randomize
