I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Randomize
