I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
pop tarts are not kleenex
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
It's 5AM and I just stirred weed butter into ramen noodles. This is not where I expected to be at 30. ...But, hey, getting high off noodles.
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
Randomize