Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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