addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
Randomize
