I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
