I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize