dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
Randomize
