i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
Shitshow foam night was such a success
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Randomize