i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
Randomize
