I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize
