If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
Sober January is a disaster.
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
Randomize