i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
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