i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
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