question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
and unfortunately for you, hallmark doesnt make a "sorry i was getting a blowie in the backseat of your car while you were driving, projectiled my jizz onto your hand, and caused you to crash" card
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
My bed is full of blood and feathers
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
Randomize
