her facebook's as public as her vagina
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
Current dream situation- Gordon Ramsey is my Uber driver and he's hauling around a backseat filled with chocolate covered açai berries. I'm good for eternity.
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
Randomize