Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
They are going to name an STD after you.
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
