Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize