It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
is that a dick in a sweater?
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
Randomize
