sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Randomize
