dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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