I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
Randomize
