You're my little dorito
You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
Randomize
