Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
Church boner. Awkwardddd
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
You had me at "let me see your balls"
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
